The sheer power and violence of a Tornado leaves lives devastated, swaths of homes and land in a twisted upheaval and the singular necessity to find optimism in the midst of obliteration to pickup and begin anew. Human purpose takes on a brand new meaning for those victims of natures demonstrative temper tantrum and its ruinous aftermath.
The irony for its victims to feel a sense of shame when they’ve clearly done nothing wrong is a twist of revelation on the human psyche. You had better believe the tornado has no shame. Were it ever to be found to have sentient qualities meeting the criteria for intelligent life, would it even possess a conscience..? I’d have to safely presume it would not.
The similarities are strikingly fitting to the dynamics and subtleties of an abusive relationship. A tornado could be hours away from being in your area, but just the thought of it and its imminent destructive force barreling towards your home is enough subconscious subtlety to raise your blood pressure to abnormal highs. This is the ominous feeling victims of abuse endure day in and day out at the thought of an abuser making his way back home. Tornados have no excuse for the hell on earth it levels upon the lives of its helpless victims, while abusers have pernicious and corruptible reasons for doing the very same thing.
I’ve not had the pleasure of being free from the stench driven personality of an abuser. I’ve come to know many of these creatures over the years and they vary in species. From the knuckle-dragging-neolithic-minded; “Me Man. You Woman. Me Strong. I Beat You…” to the pathologically compulsive and abusive sophisticate whose unchecked narcissism and professional success has falsely beguiled his ego into a self-immunized world of delusional dictatorship. These two examples and all the other mixed-nuts in-between promote and constitute the last denizens of its kind in this Civil War of domestic violence.
Just as every disease springs forth the motivated purpose of brilliant medical minds to research for a cure, every unnatural calamity nurtures dramatic human compassion for its positive equivalent of healing. A Captaincy to answer the silent cries for help; a Governance to repudiate the arrogant gall of an abuser; and a Positive Light of Influence to begin inoculating the minds of victims to become Spirits of victory. These powerful voices are analogous to the lone desert flower springing itself forth in being both persistent and determined to bring renewed life from the dry bones of intimate partner violence and its deadly effects upon personal lives. I am grateful to be associated with three such powerful examples of organizational leadership and indomitable courage in this field of war:
The National Domestic Violence Registry brings the power of database technology to the battlefront. Modeled after the sex offender registry, they possess the first and only national database model providing domestic violence conviction records to the public free of charge.
Linda’s Voice uniquely engages, empowers and educates Women, in a distinctive way to find the inner strength and confidence in finding their voice of freedom and to forever leave abusive relationships.
G.W.E.N. Global Women’s Empowerment Network is a unique therapeutic community utilizing technology and multi-media platforms to connect and empower those suffering from abusive relationships.
These three nationally acclaimed non-profits represent the invaluable leadership necessary for a new age of a viable human kindness, persistent determination, spiritual freedom and a safe survivorship.
As a Man, I am dam proud to be associated with them in blending my voice, my talents, my spirit and my masculinity to there purpose of eliminating domestic violence once and for all from this country in the 21st Century. Please support one or all three of these valiant organizations through your time, talent and/or tax-deductible donations.
“The only thing required for domestic violence to ultimately destroy our country, is continued ignorance of its existence; the one thing necessary to stop it, begins with leadership…”
THE NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE REGISTRY
GWEN Global Women’s Empowerment Network
The New American Civil War wages itself nightly on the battlefields of the American home. It’s armaments comprise physical brute strength, psychological/emotional intimidation and sexual abuse employed predominately by the physically superior of the two sides, and usually implemented with a relentless barrage of firepower.
The numbers from the War department are becoming more and more staggering: 35 million Americans directly or indirectly affected annually, over 4.8 million battery inflicted warfare injuries, assaults and rapes with fatalities of 2,347 in the year 2007 alone.
With only five months into this year, States are reporting increases of deadly skirmishes at an alarming rate. Tennessee went from being ranked 7th to now 5th nationally in battery inflicted warfare. North Carolina recorded its 23rd casualty on May 7th of a 22 year old Woman killed with a firearm by her husband. Upward spikes from Utah to New Jersey, California to Georgia tell the same story with deadly results.
The Violence Against Women Act barely survived its own deadly skirmish in the hallowed yet too often hypocritical halls of political Washington DC. It’s long and drawn out battle sent a message (albeit the wrong one) that divisions along these lines although supposedly ideologically based, somehow legitimize the need for debate when it comes to battery inflicted warfare.
The only concession granted to an enemy in this civil war of domestic violence is that of the right to surrender. Victims of abuse do not have the luxury of waiting patiently for debate, not with bombs, intimidation, guerilla warfare, terrorism, fear and death being implemented upon their person each and everyday. So unlike the old Civil War waged strategically and successfully from the top down 147 years ago, this one will have to be won from the bottom up.
Militias of good men from community to community, city to city, state to state to challenge the worst of men are needed for the fight. While politicians in expensive suits spew rancor in DC, emergency rooms across the land each and everyday bear the brunt of victims of abuse coming in with damaged limbs, broken ribs, blackened eyes, knife and gunshot wounds as well as emotional and psychological scars no measure of antibiotics or stitches can heal.
A national draft calling for battalions of Men of Valor from all walks of life are needed for the fight. In lieu of basic training, the love you proudly possess for your Daughters, Mothers, Aunts, Grandmothers, Sisters and Wives will suffice by virtue of what immeasurable contribution to your good heart and morally edified character they are directly responsible for. Bring this wisdom and truth to the table of understanding to counter the anger and insecurity that rages in the bosom of every abuser. Let the Real Man in you, challenge and counter the male embryo in him, making him understand that his choice to grasp real and redemptive change, will not be given a second chance.
This war cannot be won without the action of innumerable garrisons of Women of Virtue to become the drill Sergeants of Empowerment, Captains of Courage and Lieutenants of Lovingkindness in volunteering themselves to multitudes of victims of abuse too intimidated to go home and too victimized to find the strength to face tomorrow.
The new American Civil War will be won not by an equal force of violence upon the enemy, but by the persistence and determination of the United Spirit of Anti-Domestic Violence & Allied Souls For No More Abuse, sweeping across this nation in the form of multitudes of domestic violence organizations, victim advocacy groups, the continuing leadership of both the President and the Vice President as well as the Justice departments Office of Violence Against Women, and most importantly John and Joan Q. Public’s consciousness being raised to galvanize success through action, and not yield to defeat by silence.
Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address spoke to the necessity of the preservation of the Union. In this New American Civil War, let our Declaration of Independence speak to the preservation of eternal peace from domestic abuse, to the future address of every American home.
A number generally accounted for in the spiritual realm as being one of completion. The end of one cycle, the beginning of another. Holistic, organic and even sexy, as numbers goes. Yet, in this writing I speak to the number in horrified fashion to the excess of barbaric abuses suffered by Women around the world.
You won’t find these included in David Letterman’s top 10 countdown, neither on the immediate “to do” list of world governments to eradicate:
Bride Kidnapping in Kyrgyzstan and Turkmenistan, Honor Killing from India to Albania, Bride Burning from Pakistan to Bangladesh, Acid Attacks in Afghanistan, Female Genital Mutilation concentrated in countries throughout Africa, Human Trafficking with Albania, Moldova, Romania, Bulgaria, Russia, Belarus and Ukraine as source countries supplying Western Europe and the Middle East with Women reduced to sexual slavery, Ritual Servitude in Ghana where young virgin girls are given as slaves in traditional shrines and are used sexually by the priests in addition to providing free labor.
There you have it. The Sickening Seven. Abuses carried out against Women of the world in this 21st Century day and age of advanced technology. 12 years since the start of the new millennium and were still as a human family bringing much of the inhuman baggage of the last thousand years into the new one. The World Health Organization, United Nations, Doctors Without Borders and UNICEF are attempting in what ways are feasible to change attitudes and traditions steeped for thousands of years deep in cultural practices and beliefs.
People trying to enact change from the outside are often challenged by charges of judgmental stigmatism. “Who are we in the West to dictate what is wrong or right in another country, especially if it is signed off by their government and adopted by its religious beliefs and institutions…” I would knowingly respond to say that our God is a God of proactive creation, not organized denigration. A God of moral freedom to choose right from wrong, and not immoral indoctrination based on one’s gender.
A God of divining reproductive procreation through love and marriage, not consigned slavery by virtue of induced pregnancy through rape. Yet, regrettably it is plain to see that one person’s God is another person’s devil, and we in the United States have a moral incentive (and a financial obligation to the taxpayers footing the bill in financial aid to a great majority of these countries) to continue to ratchet up political pressure upon these governments to implement Women’s Rights into action by abolishing these horrific practices.
Yet, the best way to set an example is to lead by one. So let us as the leader of the free world get our own house in order through eradicating arguably the biggest threat to Women in our own backyard, that being Domestic Violence. Let us set the stage for the world to see that we not only exceed in the number of Women who are succeeding in Politics, Business, Education, Labor, Law, Entertainment and the like, but we also lead the world in becoming the first nation to successfully eradicate domestic violence from its culture.
The Re-Authorization of the Violence Against Women Act for another four years passed and represents a great stride in the highest level of government to not only acknowledge and protect victims of abuse, but expands itself to also increase the number of visas available to victims of domestic violence who are undocumented immigrants, it bans discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender victims of domestic violence, and it gives more authority to Native American tribes to address domestic violence.
Let us remain vigilant in our global role to consistently fight and advocate for Women’s Right’s against the seven deadly transgressions of abuse, while making certain that we do not either by inaction or omission fail to address our own sinful past and present, and in so doing become the leading world contributor of the 8th deadly sin of domestic abuse.
Imported from the time of our birth is the inalienable right of life, freedom, opportunity and the desire to be loved and give love in return. I can in no wise speak as a Woman, in obviously not being one. Yet, as a Man I can more objectively speak to my experiences of how and why a Woman should be warranted, perhaps more so than a Man of this imported birthright.
I could never in either good or bad conscience bring deliberate bodily harm unto another Soul, unless in absolute self defense of life and limb, or in the preservation of another’s. I was raised as I write this with the most biased notions of love by a Mother unselfish and overly nurturing not to my detriment of character in being spoiled, but rather to the expediency of those things that anchor a Man’s Soul to favor maturity.
Throughout my life I’ve witnessed the disempowerment of Women by virtue of an allegiance with an insecure Man. Jealousy combined with low self esteem comprises a terrible product of a Man, and often leads to violently abuse the one feminine Soul who loves him. I have learned from my Dad that one of the wisest ways for a Man to both educate and edify himself is to always uplift, empower, support and encourage the Woman by his side. To understand the nature of her love as divinely given, loyally driven and constant as both the Moon and the Stars.
This should be his dictum to mentally deliberate, regardless to whether he holds more college degrees than she does, or if he is illiterate yet still favored by her love. For the immeasurable places of a Woman heart are indescribably perfect, and perfectly describable in being akin to the unfathomable depths of space and time.
She is many nations in one Soul given her divinely given gift of maternal instincts and nurturing. I am less likely to believe this earth has not been destroyed by nuclear weapons by virtue of Man’s wisdom, than by the wisdom world leaders favorably glean from wifely love and priceless children. When men evolve, they create weapons of mass destruction. When Women evolve, they teach Men how to love.
Let this then be the clarion call for men everywhere to uplift the Woman/Women in his life. Amenities may come and go, but a Man in choosing to substantively affect a Woman’s life for the good will garner more than any dividend of stock or spoils from any corporate merger. I speak to the metaphysical values impossible to calibrate, yet discernible to communicate through her priceless smile and her genuine happiness.
We are partners in humanity to defend those who are victims of domestic violence and too intimidated to go home at night. We as Men have the power to unify and fight the scourge of domestic violence and on behalf of victims, re-import their inalienable right of life, freedom, opportunity and the desire to be loved and give love in return.
Symbolism pertains to the ideas, emotions and states of mind of an individual. As warriors against domestic violence, let us always gauge how much we as Men have beneficently derived in the blessing of the Woman/Women in our lives, and make our efforts tangibly substantive, ethically intelligent and morally meaningful to compliment our symbolic thoughts of love and protection.
LET OUR FUTURE, BE THEIR PAST…
We begin a journey of both the mind and the heart to meditate upon a not so distant time to come. Imagine a world in the future where “Domestic Violence” and the existence of “Abusers” were actually non-existent. A place where the very mention of those words were spoken of and heard only in History Museums by way of a computer program informing visitors through narrative and visual images of a time long ago on Earth where such human activity took place.
People from all walks of life young and old standing in awe, confusion, sadness and completely befuddled by old news stories, big screen 3D images and halo-graphic models unfolding a time when humanity’s inhumanity unto itself was enacted daily in millions of homes across America and around the world sanctioned by the indifference of the general population, politicians, law enforcement, state and local governments and a seemingly ineffective judicial system.
The narrative even in its artificial computer voice evoked deeply sympathetic emotions as the Museums visitors walk along the exhibit to view synthetic life-like human androids playing out a typical scene of abuse, in a typical American household, on a typical and average day.
Interesting to note how each visitor would connect with their counterpart in this simulated drama. The Women watching how the Woman who comprised the largest demographic of victims were being systematically stripped and deprived of their dignity, freedom of independence, self-respect and the ultimate cost in the final scene, their very life from their abusers.
The Men visitors would fixate with unspoken indignation upon the male android stalking, beating and terrorizing his victim in a rage that could only be construed and diagnosed as Neanderthal behavior by both the spiritual and psychological standards of the day. The hands of these visiting Men balled into a fist through instinctive protective fashion and yet unfolded only to shield the eyes of their smallest children in attendance by their side.
The children themselves watching their child counterparts living in constant fear as witnesses to the brutality suffered by their Mother. Even these visiting children in beholding the savagery depicted, discern a clear and concise meaning of the abusers primary character attribute as one of cowardice and being a terrorist, instead of a nurturing provider and a positive male role model that all men eventually progressed and evolved into becoming.
“The Redemptive & Recovery Hall” of the exhibit shines the brightest as it begins the story of how humanity began the long road of tangible redemption and holistic recovery from this most heinous and viral disease. An insidious historical scourge claiming more untold deaths than history’s Black plague of Europe, the past pandemics of Aids and Famine in Africa and the combined deaths of all previous world wars.
The now more soothing computer voice speaks along with given 3 dimensional images of how the tide seemingly and unequivocally turned in the late 20th and through the early and mid 21st century.
The emergence of a long simmering social conscience and human outrage provided the catalyst for the birth of various organizations to thrive and coalesce in defense of victims and the advocacy of holding politicians accountable in enacting more stringent laws punishing abusers.
Much to the delight of the visiting crowd, images of Men and Women from all walks of life working together to form Coalition Groups, Task Forces, Non-Profit Organizations and through vigilantly utilizing Social Media, their efforts resulted in slowly but eventually removing the cloak of ignorance by exposing and de-humanizing the abuser, while unfastening the shield of shame by Humanizing the Victims through compassion and empowerment.
The Inoculation of Greater Truth & Social Justice Always Begins With Awareness:
These History Museums of the future must and will teach of the significant and groundbreaking contribution of the National Domestic Violence Registry in the 21st Century by turning the tide of the war against DV much to the same degree as the introduction of Black troops into the Civil War, The Women’s Suffrage Movement into the Sea of Politics & the advent of Medical Vaccines in the eradication of Polio, Measles, Influenza, Chickenpox, etc; in 20th Century America.
We are history in the making. The first national database model for domestic violence convictions available to the public, is no small accomplishment and with our growing professional vanguard of Soldiers on the front line and in the trenches, victory is inevitable.
Finally, the highlight of the entire exhibit is the last and unquestionably most searing fact and image. It is the video of a future President of The United States on hand for the Ceremony Of Record in commemoration of closing the doors of the last battered Women’s shelter in America. Due to winning the war on Domestic Violence with our unyielding persistence and unwavering determination, they inevitably and quite simply became….Obsolete.
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SILENCE GIVES CONSENT, BUT VOICES GIVES VICTORY
Being silent never eradicated a wrong. Being silent does not help a victim, nor ease the responsibility and purpose of having a conscience. Justice must always be blind and impartial, but injustice can only be exposed when confronted and challenged by those unafraid and courageous enough to be willing to die for a cause.
Fear begets silence, which in turn produces more fear. How many have gone to the graves because of the wickedness of someone else’s inability to speak up? To exact a wrong is to first enact a strong investigation into the very depth’s of one’s Soul for justice while journeying through the examination of one’s Spirit for courage, in being conscience driven against the very fires of all Men of whom may oppose you.
Historically, truth has never been silent. It has spoken of itself vociferously through the necessity of justice to be made for all of humanity from the dawn of time.
Truth weeps when silence abounds, for never was a sin of silence been kept, when truth was openly met. Every victim needs a voice to speak up for them, particularly in the area of domestic violence requiring a strong chorus of Men united against the majority of abusers who comprise the same gender.
Wherein does it state in the laws of human hosts that a Man constitutes the sovereignty of bodily dominance conducive to another human being made subject to a physical beating?
Relationships by nature inherently possess a complex dynamic of emotions and attitudes requiring both nurturing and a constant thread of positive communication and honesty above and beyond conventional friendships. In a world of often chaotic and deceitful experiences, an honest, trustworthy and monogamous relationship is truly medicinal for the Mind, Soul & Body.
Yet, when things do go wrong to the extent of both verbal and physical violence, an enemy more demonstrably worse is that of the muted voice of secrecy. It is certainly easy for me or anyone else to tell a victim of domestic violence to speak up because were obviously not walking a mile in their shoes.
However, the price for not encouraging any victim towards empowerment is far greater. A soft tongue can often speak the loudest in the room. It is the method in which we encourage someone that often yields the best results.
I always remember that a victim of domestic violence should not be victimized twice. Therefore let us provide our encouragement through being non-judgmental, practicing compassion, employing patience, and providing education and resources that will enable them to once and for all look within themselves to find the strength and their inner voice to make the logical choice towards both their inner empowerment and inevitable emancipation.